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Wednesday 4 May 2011
i'm so tired of feeling this way, so empty inside, like i dont have a reason be here anymore. If things end bad then what? what am i supposed to do then? nothing will happen and i'll feel even worse then i do now. i hate this, i hate crying over the same shit all the time. I won't see anyone else because of my hope that lingers. Why i have some that lingers i dont know, maybe it because of all the things he says...but then again he changes what he says everyday. im making my self sick with worry and missing him. im getting so itchy to go, but for what? what will i get if i go there? more pain more unanswered questions? more responses like " you dont know what the future holds". im so lost and i really dont know what to think or do anymore....Is he really worth all of this? is he gonna stay like he says he is? does he really care about me and love me like he says? i dont really know and i hate it....

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